Yesterday I was walking around downtown Oakland. I found myself down in the lower half, where at least 27 people are going to ask you for change. I'm new around here. I don't always know where to go.
Let me back track. Yesterday morning I woke up next to sexy and I had to go home before I went to go do the work for the man. I grabbed my trusty bag and noticed that I had a pair of socks in there. I thought to myself, why are these socks in here? I do not recall putting these socks in here? I figured hey, I'll leave them. You never know when you might need a pair of socks.
Allow me to fast forward. I'm walking around downtown Oakland. The lower half, where at least 27 people are going to ask you for change and I realize I need to piss pee urinate caffeinate etc.. So I stop into this fast food restaurant of the 5 start caliber. I order my processed drink, ask where's the sink, and proceed down the lane where I meet a man. He was sitting by the bathroom door and he said to me, can you spare some change? I said no, can't help you. Then he said, Can you spare some socks? I stopped in my tracks and said, socks? He said yea socks? I said, as a matter of fact I can spare some socks. I will be right back. I went into the bathroom, handled my business, came out, reached in my bag and pulled out a pair of my finest black socks. I said here you go man. I don't know if they are clean. He said I don't care and proceeded to put the socks on under his worn shoes and busted feet. he said thanks. i said no problem. As I was walking out another man came up to me and said God damn, that dude is having one hell of a lucky day. to get a pair of socks from some stranger? I nodded and laughed and said something that I don't remember. On my way out the other dude followed and said, you sure you don't know that guy? I just smiled and laughed and said nope while holding my arms out.
I don't know why weird shit happens, but I know it does.
They call me Sock Man.