Saturday, September 11, 2010

I am Chip Man

I am the potato chip man
every day I deliver these potato chips
some are made of potatoes
some are not
some are made of mystery things
some are made with corn
some are deep fried in stuff
it bubbles and gooze
some are baked in ovens
they burn people in ovens sometimes too
sometimes while they are alive
I deliver the chips though
some are crispy unless they are stale
they are slightly moist and chewy
why is that?
some have cheese on them
no no no not cheese cheese
powdered cheese
yea some have salt and vinegar and sour cream powder and barbecue
but not barbecued chicken
barbecue sauce powder stuff
every day I deliver these chips to stores and gas stations and super markets
every day I go home
every day I think about driving the truck off the bridge
but I don't
the people need the chips
at the end of a week
(really, the only day I like)
i get a bunch of paper tickets
with these I like to buy some chips of my own
the company gives me a discount
they have big fancy houses
I like the cheese ones
sometimes I like to mix them with the barbecue
sometimes I use them to cut my arm and watch myself bleed
on saturday I take my kids places, mow the lawn mohawk concrete patch
I'm lucky
lots of people would kill to be the chip man
like that guy over there drinking the listerine in his own bodily fluids
yea some say he used to deliver chips too
monday I'll go deliver the chips
and start the week all over again
one day I will die
and someone else will deliver the chips

Saturday, September 4, 2010


White flight. White people leave cities and breed in suburbs

Gentrification. White people offspring return to cities and bring suburbs with them creating hipster movement and resident permit parking

Bryan moves to suburban city, jogs a lot, has thoughts.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

If Shit Rolls down Hill Part 2

In response to me recent blog about not wanting to work on a hill where shit was rolling down and wanting to avoid setting myself up for said shit avalanche a friend commented "Its all a hill"
And then I thought "damn, he's right" The world is round. Its a giant, or small, ball. You can not exist on a ball without being on a hill. Since the world is curved the whole thing is a hill. My friend is right. Shit is unavoidable. Shit....Happens...